Jesus, Cass
by WhiteGloves
Summary: Castiel has been involved in many atrocities throughout human history but his memories has been erased because he never follows orders. He was a fallen angel with Lucifer's reputation, hence was locked out. Castiel willingly stayed with the Winchesters until a visit of a very old friend, Revelation, who did right by his name and made known Castiel's past as God's favorite angel.


*** _Jesus, Cass_ ***

 _~WhiteGloves~_

 ** _~Carryon my wayward son~_**

 ** _\- one shot-_**

 ** _Hope you enjoy!_**

* * *

Dean Winchester was laughing. Extremely, with stitches at his side. He was sitting on the mapped table inside the Bunker with Castiel right in front of him whose trench coat was dripping wet and muddy. His pale angelic face had that crestfallen look as he stared in disappointment at his pal who was crushing his ribs.

"Dean."

The man raised a hand and tried to say something that only came out as gibberish. Castiel took one look good at him before sighing soundlessly, his shoulders hunching in defeat as he let his ears be filled with the mortal's laughter.

Sam came in just in time to see his brother double over his stomach. Blinking up, he exchanged looks with Castiel and saw the reason why. Castiel took one look at the younger Winchester's breaking smile that made the angel look away in vexation.

"I don't mind." Cass went on and slumped himself on Dean's opposite chair.

"What happened?" Sam tried to fake an apologetic look, only to fail at his older brother's intoxicating laughter. The angel gave him _that look_ that beats even Sam's own puppy dog eyes—the effect was instantaneous as Sam cleared his throat and hit his brother hard by the shoulder.

"Dean, you're killing yourself." He sat beside his brother with a frown on his face as he tried to give the angel a very serious look. "Cass— _what happened?_ You've been gone for days… why are you so muddy?"

Castiel paused again, his blue eyes troubled as he gazed at Sam and waited for Dean's chuckle to drown in silence. When there was no sign of if stopping any time soon, Sam frowned and finally nudged his brother sharply at the side and then shrugged at the silent angel. "Well?"

Cass narrowed his eyes at his friends.

"I… went out to search…" the angel began in his low toned voice with a hand on his trench coat. "Angels… they've all gone back to heaven. No sign… no contact…. I can't hear them… they're all back to _home_."

Sam stared at Castiel uncertainly and blinked several times. Dean was already mustering his laughter thank god but one look at his angel friend brought the chuckling again.

"Can you really kill yourself by laughing… _?"_ Castiel asked with half meant wonder in his blue eyes that made Dean choke on his last laugh and raise both hands.

"Alright, alright… stop glaring, man."

"I'm not a _man_ —" Castiel shifted on his chair uncomfortably as he caught Sam's eyes. "I'm not glaring."

"Cass," came Sam, "fine, you searched for them—so what—you searched high and low bridges till you hit the dump?"

"Go, Sherlock." Dean smirked at his brother as he reached for a bottle of beer in front of him and winked at the angel, "This is Cass we're talking… there's always more than meets the eye. You tell him, Cass."

Castiel's jaw tightened as his friend chuckled again before turning to Sam.

"I _thought_ I saw a demon… more of a trifle really, I chased it. I wouldn't have done so but given the circumstances… any _supernatural stuff—_ low rank—even a ghost— is worth seeing these days."

"There's always a mirror in the bathroom, Cass." Dean smiled. "Try it."

"In your words— _shut up."_ The angel glowered as he sat straight and eyed the younger Winchester to continue, "I uh… chased it on the road, it was like a black rabbit… it moved like a cat. Quite faster like a cheetah, really."

"Alright, no more animal channel for you." Dean couldn't resist a grin but it melted upon the look on his friend's face.

Sam shrugged his ever bulky biceps. "And you got dirty because…?"

"It went down a manhole and I couldn't follow." Castiel casted his eyes down. "So I rounded up on the nearest river where the water flow ends and I waited and waited…" he shook his head in defeat. "For hours till dark… I walked around the ditch but it never came out."

Silence.

Except for Dean's laughter. Sam didn't share his enthusiasm though as he gave his brother a funny look.

"And this is hilarious because…?"

Dean stopped with his sharp eyes finding his brother's. "Seriously, man? You're gonna make me explain a _joke?"_

"I didn't find it funny."

"Who are you Sam? Is this the first time you meet Cass—?"

"Hold on a second— I mean _how is that funny?_ " the two faced each other, leaving the heavenly being staring into a space with a hand still clutching his trench coat. "He gets lost in the woods— _not for the first time—_ and you're cracking?"

Dean had that disbelief look in his eyes as he pointed a hand at the angel.

"Cass, tell this idiot why you went around the ditch and not enter the manhole."

Sam turned to Castiel who blankly stared back and let silence prevail for a second then—

"It was a _manhole,_ Sam." He explained with his droopy blue eyes full of patience and all earnestness, " _I'm an angel._ I'm not allowed."

Dean was cracking on the side again while the younger brother stared at Castiel. He glanced sideways at Dean whose head was on the table and done for before looking back at the celestial being who was watching his brother with pitiful contorted eyebrows.

"Your brother loves to see my misfortune." He explained.

"Alright," Sam flattened both palms on the table with a look of utter confusion on how to react, "So… a _manhole_ sign stops an angel from breaking-in no sweat… and here we keep on using warding spells to keep them off when a simple straightforward sign could do it?"

Dean was lost to laughter and seconds later, Sam was sharing the sentiment with a grin.

Castiel looked at both brothers and finally let go of his coat. "I'll clean up." And he vanished in a blink.

"Hey, Cass—" the younger Winchester tried as Dean went and drank from the bottle he was holding with the smile not leaving his lips.

"I haven't laughed like this since… _yesterday_." He said with a shake of his hand, "Man I haven't laughed this long—a month's laughter that's what it is. You know what he did yesterday when I told him to get me fresh milk? Before I could even tell him it's in the fridge with all the other stuff he disappeared and came back with a bucket of _fresh milk fresh from the Alps!_ " he snickered while Sam pressed another grin and grabbed himself a bottle of beer.

"What you want _fresh milk_ for?" he asked.

Dean paused and gave his brother a ridiculous look.

"Seriously, that's what you're diggin?"

"No—I mean, come on— you know it's _Cass—_ the guy who still disappears when you tell him the expression ' _get out'."_

"I tell him that out of habit."

"And he still flinches doubtfully when he hears it."

"Haha…" Dean leaned back on his chair in amusement. "Good ol' Cass."

"And…" Sam glanced behind him and then back at his brother. " _You know he can hear us."_

"That's why we're talking." Dean shrugged chugged his beer with a pleased wink. "Dude knows everything in this house. Our very own poltergeist."

* * *

Castiel found himself inside his room with his favorite trench coat now clean. It didn't take him a beat to clean it when he was attentive and wondered why he didn't thought of it in the first place before Dean saw him. And got the best out of him.

Not that it mattered at the time as the angel found himself sitting down the bed slowly with hands pressed tightly on his thighs, a heavy expression on his face, his blue eyes lost and grave. He could not hear anything from the angel radio… could not contact anyone up in heaven which only validated his firs assumption—that after the return of God in Heaven, the place had been restored but it had no place for the likes of him—him and Lucifer alike.

No more angels walking the earth just… the sullied fallen ones.

He closed his eyes and sighed again, another habit his vessel had now developed in the long run even though angels need not breathe to live. _He learned it_ after becoming painfully human, an experience he would never _forget._

 _"You sure, Castiel?"_

Cass started up, alert. A voice in his head— someone was trying to contact him. Slowly raising himself from the bed, he travelled his eyes across the dark room and turned all ears to the signal from heaven.

 _"You're crying."_

"Who's there?" the angel narrowed his eyes at the corners of the room, and then like a passing cold air, felt someone go through him—making him hastily look behind to find an apparition of pure white light—

Castiel's blue eyes flashed in the brightness, till everything went dark once more except that this time he wasn't alone. A tall, celestial being wearing a dark reverend's clothing stood at the corner of his room with sharp eyes and black top hat. On his hand was a thick volume of a black covered book with no title yet Castiel was sure he knew it from somewhere. He eyed the being for a second with curiosity arising from within him while the visitor gave him a narrowed look.

"Here we are again, Castiel. You never cease to amaze me. How many times have you been locked out of heaven, do you remember?" when the angel didn't say anything, the unknown being closed his eyes patiently and turned to the chair on the corner where he sat down, dark eyes on the angel. "Well, _at least you are quieter._ The previous yous always have all sorts of questions I sometimes just want to zap your head to get the memories juggled and then zap them all out till you're clean and back in heaven whole as new."

Castiel opened his mouth but no words came out until he saw the being before him raised eyebrows.

"Who are you?" the angel managed softly.

"I'm _the Revelation_ and here to give you a briefing of who you are and why you keep on repeating your history of getting kicked out of heaven time and again with the mortals, give the memories back, erase them all over again so you can start new and wreck havoc again in this world in your next, well, _duty_."

The angel stared in utter surprise at Revelation whose eyes shone in interest.

"My…" Revelation whispered with a clutch on his book, " _You are broken._ _More than you used to._ So this is what happens when Lucifer gets involved and you seeing your Father."

"Wait," Castiel took a deep breath as he eyed his visitor with hands rising defensively in front of him. "What do you mean _I wreck havoc again'?_ "

"I was just talking to _Death_ , you know. Just catching up." Revelation leaned his back in the chair, his eyes never leaving the angels, "He had the most amusing stories about you playing God _again_ … and the next-in-line brothers. And I thought Cain and Abel were your favorite."

Castiel pressed his lips closed and silence fell between the two.

"Speak." He then went on calmly but his voice vibrated in rage. "Who are you and what do you mean?"

"There we go." Revelation smiled with this snaky corner of lips and put both hands on the top of his book, "You're now in all attention. I have learned better in dealing with a distracted you—so full of questions. Simply saying, I am _Revelation_ and I am here to clean up your mess _again—_ I don't suppose you remember but it has been in your character to stubbornly heel God even when you were just his messenger, Castiel."

Silence again—then Revelation saw the angel shrug expectantly.

"Is there a problem?"

"I thought you were just going to zap the details in my head and not… _talk_." Cass muttered, "Less talk."

Revelation pressed his thin lips closed and gave the angel a cold look.

"Again, _you've change._ You're not as skeptical as the last—"

Castiel suddenly raised his arms again. "I get it, I have memories of a past life I was taken the privilege _not to remember._ I heard that from Naomi already… surprisingly I believed her."

"Adaptable." Revelation smiled once more. "You're getting good at this."

"Now please… spare me the details—"

"Are you sure?"

Castiel hesitated, and then ended up sighing. "Well, no. Just… keep on talking then."

"Where do you get this humor?" Revelation wondered, "Is it the Winchesters? The effect of modernity, I see." Seeing the firm silence of the angel, Revelation pressed his lips too and touched his book and opened it on a particular chapter. "Oh well, to business then— _Angel of the Lord, Cassiel,_ that was _your original name,_ no? God's very own messenger and one whom God could never control— _behavior wise."_

A struck expression hit the angel as he stared wide eyed at the being who went on—

"I know, but whatever you have done in the past was nothing in comparison to what you have been doing these century—"

"I disobeyed… _God?"_

"You sound so surprise." Revelation turned a page without looking at the angel, "It's your nature so I suppose you could stop that beating expression on your face. _As an Angel of the Lord,_ of course you were different from others; you are the special angel distinct and unique from all other angels and that part of your duty was to send God's personal messages to his creation shortly after civilizations starts forming. Yes, for some time you were his representative."

Revelation looked up when no response came that made him wonder if he was alone—only to find Castiel staring at him with a pale look and horrified eyes.

"I… I'm _that_ Angel of the Lord _?"_ he asked, blinking his eyes many times it was almost painful.

"Who do you think you are? I only need to erase your memories, but it is the same you. But then you have a habit of acting on your own judgment, even disobeying God's will on the first chapter of life when you stopped Abraham in taking Isaac's life. The boy was meant to die but then _you_ intervened out of… _what was it?_ Compassion?"

Cass' jaw dropped open as he looked around as if nauseous.

"I… was that _angel?_ "

"Who else? And who else do you think wrestled with Jacob while on duty and disabled the poor thing."

"I…"

"The worst part was when you nearly destroyed Jerusalem. Oh well, some pieces of your life history witnessed and written down on the Bible I suppose."

He flashed Castiel a grim smile who finally fell back and slumped on the bed looking weak.

"I didn't think you'd get worse but you did, Castiel." He went on quietly, eyes back on the pages of his book, "But God adored you… and it's probably because you so adored his people too… isn't that why he sent you to earth to take the form of earth's Savior? Gabriel took over your position after that and it so changed you… no wonder you became so attached to His creation even till this day and no matter the number of times I erase your memory you still cling back to humanity because _you were a human_."

"What are you saying?" the angel found his voice again and felt a prickle of what felt like needles picking on the inside of his brain. "Y-you mean I'm—"

"I thought it was your last resurrection but look at you now."

Castiel's mouth dropped open as he watched Revelation smile simply.

"No—" the angel began—

"Finally." Revelation raised his eyes to the ceiling, "Skepticism. But believed it or not, it's true. And you were never quite the same with your _humanity_ still in you even in heaven. The trouble you caused there… and everybody thought you were a pacifist. But again, God _so adored_ the son he sacrificed and accepted your flaws—so here comes me—of service of always keeping you straight whenever the mayhem you cause are beyond repair and you are locked out of heaven— _just like you are now._ Believe me, I don't think this will be the last time. How many times have I told you this already?"

"That's impossible." Castiel suddenly found his strong voice, his eyes with glaze of blue light, "If what you're saying is true—then the me from heaven—the angels speak of me—"

"They only know you as Castiel." Revelation said as he raised his chin, "God didn't want to expose your… eccentricities when you requested to join the angels. You didn't think it wise to let them know your human name either. It seems sitting by his side did not satisfy you as you expected, given where you came from—"

"I would never feel that way of my Father—!"

"Suit yourself, we are here, are we not?"

The angel's jaw tightened and for the first time, fear was in his eyes. A long silence fell like a swoop in the room. Nobody spoke, nobody even breathed. There was just a cold air between the two in the middle of their meaningful eye contacts. Till there—Castiel saw visions of visions hidden in Revelations eyes.

And that was when he believed him.

"Is this why he keeps on resurrecting me? To punish me from leaving him?"

"I think His exact words were— ' _He is the son I shall never forsake again'—_ so yes, I have to bring you back to heaven to your Father's wishes. Besides, he has always been delighted with you… always loving these… _humans._ Embracing them as if they are you. Again, I cannot blame you."

"I thought it was Naomi who kept on erasing my memories?"

"She's only done so centuries ago when God stopped responding. Even she did not have inkling of your past but with the factory duty of erasing your memories and never punishing you. It seems things took a different turn when God disappeared—"

"So he did abandon me— _us—!"_

"Believe me, he had seen you go through far worst scenario and never let up. It seems he did not want to spoil you. But the last bite was when Lucifer, another favorite, came in contact with you. Plus with the addition of a sister that he was force to show himself."

Castiel shot up from the bed and finally managed to cross the room towards his visitor till he was standing a foot from him, his expression sour and discontent.

"If I am who you say I am then why didn't he speak to me after everything here with Lucifer and—?"

"He thinks you have outgrown a Father."

"What?"

"He was in a weakened state, do I need to remind you?"

"No—he didn't think of wasting a moment to speak to me when I was the one who kept on looking for him! And we were in the same room!"

"He spoke to you, you just don't remember—"

"Oh, great—!"

"He didn't waste time in reviving you though." Revelation closed the book sharply as he saw the angel hovering threateningly before him that reminded Castiel who he was talking to. "Even when you died a human… what do you think compelled Gadreel to revive you? There is power there, Castiel. Always looking for you."

"Purgatory—"

"Ah, now, even your Father thought you deserved that one for awhile."

 _"I killed many of my kind! How could he just watch me—?"_

"That's what He does."

The answer rendered the angel speechless and for a long time he just stood there, staring at Revelation like how he would have stared Death in the eye.

 _"Death_ does not think highly of you." Revelation then went on as if reading the angel's mind. "He had always loathed this invisible string pulling you right up to life but he does respect God. The two of them are, well… now you understand why _Death_ has inkling towards the Winchesters."

"Not really."

" _Favoritism._ He was trying like God, though in some ways, _Death_ is also God. Speaking of which…"

Revelation suddenly looked sideways to the doorway. Distracted, Castiel frowned and turned to the door too where things were motionless and silent until—

 _Two resounding gunshots followed by consecutive bumping sounds from the outside—_

Revelation narrowed his eyes. "How did they…?"

 _"Cass!"_ Dean shouted strongly though it sounded like from somewhere far. _"Cass!"_

"Dean…" Castiel blinked once and then noticed Revelation standing beside him with eyes all intent towards his head.

"Come now, let's finish this." He raised his hand. "Erase your memory of everything you have done so far and let's have you return in heaven—"

The angel stared at the tall being before stepping backwards, still distracted by Dean, and then Sam's cry of outrage outside.

"What will happen when I go back there?" he whispered with his voice reverberating, his blue eyes meaningful.

"Find out for yourself." Revelation simply answered. "This is not your second, third, fourth of even the hundredth time but from your reputation I'm sure it's something worth looking forward to. Don't worry, it won't end."

Castiel glared.

"No."

"No?"

"I don't want to go back."

"You've told me that before, I didn't listen. What makes you think I—" he raised a hand but Castiel subdued his wrist with another flashing glare and the two stood too close to one another when a loud blasting sound sent the wooden door flying away and there was Sam and Dean, eyes locking with what was happening in the room.

"Cass?" Sam shouted as Dean jumped in the fray in time for Castiel to turn to his visitor—

"Because if you don't _I know certain people_ will hunt you."

Revelation raised an eyebrow but then he vanished to nothingness—

Right when Dean tackled Castiel and the two fell down side first on the floor with a loud crashing sound.

" _Ow!"_ the older Winchester cursed out loud.

* * *

"What the hell?" Dean Winchester said at full volume as the three of them found themselves again by the mapped table with Castiel now holding a bottle of beer on his own hands. He found out the brothers were alerted of an intruder's presence when the house locked down and him not appearing when summoned. Realizing something was off, they went to his room to find it impenetrable and used powerful spells to try and force it to open to which Castiel was grateful and felt sorry for the door for some reason.

Moments later, Castiel finished telling them what _Revelation_ had revealed with a nice sip on his bottle.

"Yes, I know." He told them with his eyebrows contorting while Sam watched him in awe. Dean looked disgruntled.

"You're telling me you're the guy Sam's been praying at night?" he shot a look at the angel.

"I pray to God—" Sam corrected then shook his head, "I pray to Cass— _you pray to Cass!"_

"It's different when you realize he's that dude hanging by the crucifix, you know?"

"That's not me—" Castiel objected—

"But you just said—"

"It's not me—I'm in a different vessel."

Both Sam and Dean stared at the angel blankly.

"Which can probably explain why the vessel fits you well," the younger Winchester went on in straight explanation, "Maybe the Novaks were long descendants on your family tree—maybe that's why it can adapt to you, you know? That's why it's also very powerful. Plus you came from a family with very strong faith—that's gotta say something."

"We can always trace that, right?" Dean asked with a look at his brother.

"There's no need." Castiel shook his head and eyed his friends. "This… this whole thing… even if it's true I don't feel it. Even if I do get back to heaven and things just keep repeating itself I don't think that's just the choice… I mean… what's the point of doing the same things over and over again… if I don't get to remember them and learn from them?"

He narrowed his eyes at the two who nodded amicably.

"Friggin' angels." Dean muttered hotly with eyes showing anger as he took a chug on his beer, his lashing eyes falling to Castiel. "They mess with your head again I won't come as an angel when I die."

"I don't think we'll go there anyway." Sam chuckled. "We're no _angels._ Never been."

"Exactly."

Castiel smiled at the notion and drank once more, feeling both the brothers' eyes boring on him.

"You two want to tell me something?" he asked quietly as he raised his eyes at them.

"Ah…" Dean smirked with a look at his brother, "well… Sam's always been a fan of _Jesus,_ Cass."

"I'm not." Sam quickly said, and then turned to the angel at once. "No offense."

"None taken."

"You know… the whole 'saving the world' thing…" Dean drank the bottle empty with a strange expression and slammed it down the table with contorted eyebrows. "I was thinking if there was anybody who's gonna do that, it's always you, Cass. You got that soul right."

"I still think differently." Castiel stood straight and pressed his lips closed. "But I suppose… that life must have been difficult."

"You bet."

Sam smiled. "I just can't believe you're not who I think you are, Cass."

"Oh, he's exactly who I think he is." Dean countered with a smirk and a wink at the angel. "Same old badass angel."

"I try to …" Castiel cleared his throat, "take that comment as a compliment… _with difficulty."_

"It's really so surprising, Cass…" Sam was practically with shining eyes.

"Like we didn't find it surprising God's got a sister." Dean muttered and gave Castiel one intimidating look. "So do we start calling you _Jesus?"_

Castiel glared and disappeared on the spot.

Dean shrugged casually and opened another bottle. "That's a no then. _Hey, Cass, no leaving the Bunker, ya hear? If anyone's gonna erase your memory you give me a shout!"_

Sam grinned and tapped Dean by the shoulder and then the tall, younger brother slipped out from his chair.

"I just can't believe this." He mused as he walked away. _"Jesus…"_

"You going to dig on the Novaks?" Dean followed him suit.

"Yeah, you?"

"Reading _Jesus."_

"Seriously?" Sam paused and the brothers stared at one another—

"What?" Dean shook him off and went to the shelves. "I gotta review don't I?"

"You're just going to make him uncomfortable."

"That's what _brothers do._ " Dean smiled mischievously. "It's not every day you get to meet the most popular guy in the whole wide world."

"I thought you said it was you." Castiel appeared in front of Dean who looked taken aback for awhile, before sighing.

"It's me. It's different if it's Jesus. You always hear them on streets don't you?" he clamped a hand around the angel's shoulder and started steering him towards the shelves, "Now here's the thing, you do not react to anyone on the street calling 'Jesus name' or not even when I'm cursing, you hear me, Cass?"

Castiel stared at him flat. "You ought to respect that name."

Dean nodded. "Fine. I won't curse anymore."

"And nobody should say the name on the street."

"Oh, we'll get rid of them too. Anything to make you comfy."

"Thank you, Dean." The angel disappeared in a blink of an eye.

"Scared, Dean?" Sam called out from his laptop with a smirk.

Dean Winchester grunted and looked away.

 _"What? The guy cracked heaven open!"_

* * *

 ** _*THE END*_**

 _ **A/N: No offense intended!**_

 _There are hundreds, thousands of fanfiction out there for this series!_ _And I just joined in! Amazing!_

 _I always thought the story lines of the canon was so damn good that it needed no 'serious' fanfiction' that's why romantic ones are around!_

 _This is just a friendly interpretation of what I think of 'Angel of the Lord' thing ;)_

 _Besides that- it fits Cass ;)_

 _Love lots for the show!_

 **~Thanks for Reading~**


End file.
